IGJAWEIOGJAWEIGJA
FIND THESE HORSES
omg
it’s gonna be the best week ever
(Source: damnthatswhack)
"a big gooey marshmallow core, covered in a thin crispy layer of absurdity." --absurdical
26, baby academic, pop-culture geek. An acquired taste, like goat cheese or Mr. Bean. Here there be: good-looking British actors and comedians, Community and Parks&Rec, Downton Abbey and other costume dramas, Tarantino, Doctor Who, Potter, Tolkien, Star Trek, sweaters/vests/sweatervests, Victorians, and things of questionable heterosexuality.
I also run Heck Yes, Matthew Goode! if you like things that are god damned glorious. Ask me anything
26, baby academic, pop-culture geek. An acquired taste, like goat cheese or Mr. Bean. Here there be: good-looking British actors and comedians, Community and Parks&Rec, Downton Abbey and other costume dramas, Tarantino, Doctor Who, Potter, Tolkien, Star Trek, sweaters/vests/sweatervests, Victorians, and things of questionable heterosexuality.
I also run Heck Yes, Matthew Goode! if you like things that are god damned glorious. Ask me anything
May 27, 2012
May 14, 2012
This is a true story.
| me: | I JUST SAW A GIANT ROACH IN THE KITCHEN WHAT DO I DO |
| absurdical: | KILL IT |
| FIND IT KILL IT | |
| SPRAY RAID EVERYWHERE | |
| me: | WANTED TO BUT IT RAN AWAY AND NOW I CAN'T FIND IT |
| IT'S GOING TO EAT ME | |
| absurdical: | FIND IT |
| KILL IT | |
| KILL THE SHIT OUT OF IT | |
| SPRAY RAID EVERYWHERE | |
| IT CAN'T EAT YOU SO YOU HAVE TO MURDER IT | |
| me: | IF I DO IT'LL COME OUT AND RUN AT ME |
| absurdical: | GOOD |
| me: | NOOO |
| absurdical: | MEET IT ON THE FIELD OF BATTLE |
| SLAY YOUR FOE | |
| YOU HAVE TO KILL IT | |
| BEFORE IT GETS ANY IDEAS ABOUT BREEDING | |
| ONCE MORE UNTO THE BREECH, NICOLE, ONCE MORE! | |
| me: | COME HERE AND KILL IT FOR ME |
| absurdical: | OR CLOSE UP THE WALL WITH YOUR ROACH-RIDDEN BODY |
| AW HELL NO | |
| GO GET YOUR SPRAY AND KILL IT | |
| ANY POISON WILL DO | |
| me: | maybe i should go get the landlord's son |
| absurdical: | NO WAY |
| me: | though he might judge me |
| absurdical: | THIS IS NOT IN YOUR LEASE |
| YOU KILL IT | |
| me: | IT WAS ENORMOUS |
| absurdical: | put on your boots |
| PUT ON YOUR BOOTS | |
| me: | ...I killed it |
| absurdical: | did you? |
| me: | Now what do I do |
| how do words | |
| absurdical: | throw it out, spray poison all along the walls and crevices where somehthing could come in |
| me: | People are probably going to come up here because I screamed the whole time |
| absurdical: | hahahahahaha |
| BUT YOU DID IT | |
| me: | "NO NO STOP LIVING STOP IT NO" |
| absurdical: | YAY YOU KILLED IT |
| me: | I'm all flustered |
| absurdical: | but you did it you killed it!!! |
| me: | I'M GONNA CRY |
| how do I dispose of it | |
| it's so big and scary even though it's dead | |
| absurdical: | broom? |
| me: | then i have to look at it |
| absurdical: | and dustpan? |
| make sure it's really dead because sometimes they FAKE | |
| so spray it | |
| me: | WHY AM I SO AFRAID |
| absurdical: | I KNOW IT'S HARD BUT YOU JUST HAVE TO |
| OR IT'LL BE THERE FOREVER | |
| me: | IT'S ALL THE WAY UNDER THE COUNTER |
| absurdical: | GET IT |
| THROW IT OUT | |
| me: | WASN'T I BRAVE ENOUGH ALREADY |
| absurdical: | JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE |
| THEN YOU CAN CURL UP ON THE COUCH AND SCREAM FOREVER | |
| me: | ejfiaehfpiaep |
| IT'S NOT THERE ANYMORE | |
| I GIVE UP | |
| I'M MOVING | |
| absurdical: | WHAT |
| AUGH | |
| SPRAY RAID EVERYWHERE | |
| me: | ....i killed it |
| absurdical: | again? |
| me: | would you believe that i seem to have hurt myself doing so |
| absurdical: | DID YOU DISPOSE THE BODY |
| me: | YES |
| i hurt my finger somehow | |
| and it is swelling up! lololol | |
| absurdical: | hahahaahhaha |
| me: | EVERYTHING IS GREAT |
| absurdical: | GREAT |
May 11, 2012
ZLOT, OUR QUEUES HAVE SYNCED! i don’t think this is a problem.
#the story of me and zlot #that story is now inextricably linked with that of agent phil coulson and clark gregg oops
i love you.
May 3, 2012
Attention everyone: in honor of Avengers Day, I am outing absurdical as a sap.
April 24, 2012
thinking of that dream i had this morning — zlot was there and we adopted some cats. then we had tea. it was lovely.
— paul bettany
(Source: favorite-colors)
January 29, 2012
GOD IS ABSURDICAL’S MOTHER I KNEW IT.
I knew it.
I AM SO HUNGRY, HUNGRY FOR FLAN AND FOR JESUS
JK JUST FLAN
(Source: tumblr4men, via bookh8r)
January 26, 2012
But is it an intro post?
January 4, 2012
gaffegaffe:czargasm:absurdical:
2011 cannot end without putting this lie on my blog after a long spell of sitting neglected in my messages. #iluzlot also, maybe your resolutions should include ‘being nicer to Justin Mikita.’
I screamed. I love my mean girls. My resolution is to spend more time with my mean girls.
You guys we have a whole new YEAR to make fun of Justin Mikita in. WHAT WILL HE DO IN 2012??? It’s scarf weather after all, so literally anything could happen. This is his Sampson season, and we are all Delilahs.
Also, hi Justin Mikita! Stop googling yourself. This is what happens. I hope this has been A Lesson.
HAHAHA I HATE/LOVE YOU GUYS. mostly love.
October 18, 2011
IT’S ABSURDICAL’S BIRTHDAY EVERYONE DANCE AND SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!
October 6, 2011
zlot liked your link: H8er of Books: Mountain Day at Mount Holyoke
I can’t stop laughing.
August 11, 2011
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
Tommy James and the Shondells - “I Think We’re Alone Now” (mf)
lolololol zlot re: this. it’s just you, me, the ducklings, and that muff.
August 9, 2011
THE ONLY SORTING HAT QUIZ YOU WILL EVER NEED TO TAKE
It is one question, devised by myself and absurdical.
WOULD YOU KILL YOUR BEST FRIEND
a) no
b) yes
c) what
d) how muchANSWER CAREFULLY.
July 13, 2011
we are talking about what harry potter would have been like if his parents never died
| absurdical: | i just want to read an 800-page book where dumbledore asks james to go to the lake and get the horcrux with him and james brings sirius and they never make it to the lake because they stopped to get wasted at a pub first |
| absurdical: | and then the wizarding world is engulfed in fascism and lily and remus's heads are on spikes outside the ministry |
| absurdical: | which is sad as lily was about to give birth to sophie potter, THE JEALOUS HATEFUL SPITEBABY REMUS PUT INSIDE HER DURING THEIR REVENGE SEX WHILE JAMES AND SIRIUS WERE AWAY BEING ASSHOLES. |
| zlot: | guys what if dick-rich-kid-harry beat up neville during their 'playdates' |
| zlot: | GUYS |
July 9, 2011
watching XFC/the training scene
| bookh8r: | unf |
| yeah | |
| turn it | |
| yeah | |
| baby | |
| yeah | |
| oh yeah | |
| almost there | |
| turn that fucking satellite | |
| turn it towards me | |
| oh godddd | |
| you're doing it | |
| you're fucking doing it | |
| yeah do it | |
| do it | |
| absurdical: | you're all sweaty |
June 5, 2011
Shit, welcome to my guilty pleasure. Population: me, these bitches, and HENRY FIELDING’S TOM JONES.
RSS feed: http://zlot.tumblr.com/rss
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