I’ve always said that if my son thinks of me as one of his idiot friends, then I’ve succeeded as a dad. If he wants to go the wrong way on the escalator, I’m on board. If he wants to go into a restaurant and pretend we’re Australian, then…
Outstanding Supporting Actress In A Comedy Series: Julie Bowen
Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Comedy Series: Ty Burrell
Claire: Honey, do you want popcorn or anything?
Phil: No, I’m good… ‘N’ plenty. So hold your water ‘cause I’ve got some twix’ up my sleeve.
Claire: You may be cool, but ‘I’m… wine cooler’.
Phil: I love us.
Phil: “Guys, I can’t go to Vegas because my wife’s freaking out!” Trust me, that is not a phone call you want to make to a bunch of ex-college male cheerleaders. They will mock you with a hurtful, rhythmic taunt.
Jay: “What the hell are those?”
Phil: “Onion goggles. No more tears when I cook. Welcome to the 21st century. You should get a pair.”
Jay: “I was gonna suggest the same thing.”
Luke: “Smell Heather for me.”
Phil: “I always do…not.”
You changed me for the better in a hundred different ways. Yeah, I might miss a book or salad here and there…but I’ve got Claire all over me.
Phil: Your mouth might be saying, ‘Hey, we cool’ but your eyes are like, ‘No, we not.’
omg but do people not realise the john hurt doctor won’t change the numbering?
like literally in that last scene